Love and Loss
by KiunoNamu
Summary: Itachi's lover finds his journal discovering his plans to destroy their clan. She confronts Itachi to face her fate. Very Sad. One Shot. Will probably make you cry.


**A/N**

**A short story that crept into my mind and wouldn't leave me alone until I wrote it. Hope you enjoy. **

**Warning: May make you cry.**

**Oneshot**

**I don't own Naruto**

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**Though lovers be lost love shall not; **

**And death shall have no dominion.**

**~Dylan Thomas~**

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The small black binding slid against her fingers as she felt the first wave of tears begin to fall. She gaped at the page before her trying time and time again to process the beautifully scribed letters written in Itachi's latest journal entry; the last sentence sending unpleasant chills throughout her body.

_This is my farewell; these thoughts shall be destroyed along with the rest of the Uchiha clan tomorrow night._

_Forever faithful,_

_Itachi_

Tomorrow night… that's all she had. Tomorrow night his plans for the elimination of the great Uchiha clan would be completed. She flipped through the small book, reading a few more entries, further sending her heart sinking as she did so.

Itachi was suffering.

Suffering with the knowledge that he would have to kill everyone he had ever cared about. His entries spoke of him feeling numb and that withdrawing from those he cared about seemed to help ease the pain… at least a little. She quickly realized he had full intentions to keep his younger brother alive; the task of taking the boy's life was just too much for his older brother to bear. Then came the entry regarding her life.

_I will miss her terribly and I cannot express the depth of my regret and agony of having to kill my dearest. She promised me a life of peace and happiness that will never come to pass. I will be branded as a killer and must fulfill my duty to protect this village. I only wish she could forgive me for such a deed as this, however I know I could never ask for such a thing. My Shizuka, you shall forever be in my heart._

_Yours always,_

_Itachi_

Another fresh wave of tears fell as she clutched the small book to her chest, sinking to her knees on the floor. Oh how he was suffering and how stupid she had been to not realize the depth of that suffering. She had no idea what he had been going through. She had thought he had found another, that someone else within the village had stolen his affections, but how wrong she had been. She should have noticed how much he kept ignoring his family, even his younger brother Sasuke. The poor child had been pleading for his attention and she could only imagine the agony Itachi could be feeling from receiving such affection.

It had been two weeks since Itachi had spoken to her and in her moment of weakness she had finally decided to confront him about it. Taking the long way to his home she had hoped to catch him there, but unfortunately luck didn't seem to be on her side. His mother had welcomed her in and quickly expressed her concerns for her eldest son's behavior, confiding her fears in her son's fiancé. She waited in his room, pacing the floor slowly when a floorboard caught her sandal sending her to the ground. She quickly moved to replace it when she noticed the small black book resting neatly underneath. Curiosity getting the better of her she lifted it to reveal his journal.

She remained sitting on his bed a little longer, contemplating her next actions, then decided to hide the journal in the folds of her Yukata. She was now sure Itachi was avoiding her, refusing to return home simple because of her presence. She left a small note on his dresser.

_Itachi,_

_Meet me in our secret place…please_

_Love,_

_Your Shizuka_

She prayed it would be enough to convince him to come. If his plans went through then it would be the last chance she would ever have to see him. She tiptoed down the stairs, slipping past his mother and running down the cobblestone sidewalk. She knew it was rude, but none of them would be around after tomorrow night anyway so it didn't matter.

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She settled on the bed of their little cabin safely nestled in the woods away from prying eyes. Itachi had built the structure himself, with the help of his closest friend. They had planned on making it their summer home after marriage. Upon entering one could see a fire place to the left with their bed to the right and a small wooden table that rested in the middle pressed against the wall. The building provided comfort and serenity for the both of them. She now sat in silence, simply listening to the fire cackle and burn

It was only two in the afternoon.

Then three…

Then four…

She remained hopeful as six come around. Surely he would give her at least one final farewell.

Finally, after hours, the door slowly creaked open to reveal Itachi's dark figure walking through the doorway. He wore a solemn look on his beautiful face as he closed it behind him, locking eyes with her own.

"You can come in." She offered him. He slid his shoes off in silence and opted to sit on the low stool in the corner. His silence and lack of affection made her heart ache, but she supposed she understood. The further he pulled away the easier the mission would be, not that it would be easy at all.

"What do you want Shizuka?" His voice was cold, completely void of emotion. It made her doubt herself before she felt the small book still clutched in the folds of her clothing. She steeled herself, trying to regain control of her emotions. It could be his plan to simply kill her now, it would fit the mission as no one would discover her body for days. No one ever came into their little hideout. That was fine as long as she got the chance to express her feelings she didn't care what fate had in store for her.

"I know." She whispered. She watched his body shift towards her, focusing his onyx eyes onto hers. Those beautiful eyes that would still allow her to speak, its not that she minded the red, but he was so skilled with the Sharingan that she wouldn't have a chance for anything if he activated it,"I know what you're planning tomorrow night."

"How?" His voice suddenly turned deadly. She averted her gaze as she brought the small book from the confines of her sleeve. His entire body stiffened at the sight of it.

"I found your journal…" Silence permeated the air then. She knew the war raging in his mind now, the one that told him she had to die, right there. She could ruin the mission, ruin his goals for the future and potentially endanger the entire village. She had become a liability, "I haven't told anyone."

"Why?"

"I understand." She finally managed to whisper. Itachi's gaze softened slightly, but his body didn't relax, "I didn't bring you here to talk you out of your mission."

"Then why am I here?" The tone of his voice wavered slightly. He was confused, not understanding her reasoning.

"Because I know this is going to be a burden on you beyond imagination… and I wanted to tell you," She paused to ensure he was listening, "I won't blame you for my death." She knew the words had struck him deeply, that her death had been weighing on his mind and it brought her a little comfort to know that he still loved her. He placed his head in his hands, hiding his face from her view, "Itachi, I love you… I will always love you and I just wanted you to know that. Perhaps I'm a fool for trying to make this light on you, but I don't want you to remember me and feel guilt. I want you to remember me and feel happiness."

He still didn't respond. Slowly she stood, making her way towards him. He didn't move as she knelt, taking his battle worn hands away from his face to reveal the tears that were silently falling. She felt her heart catch in her throat as he avoided her eyes.

"Look at me Itachi," Reluctantly he obeyed, "May I make one final request of you?"

"Anything." He breathed through his tears.

"Will you make me your wife?" His shocked expression turned to sobs as he gently pressed his lips to hers. She could taste the salt from them and feel his lips tremble as he tried, in vain, to hold them back.

"Why would you want such a thing from me? After what I have to do?"

"Because I want to go into the next world knowing I loved you in every way."

He again pressed his lips to hers, this time in a fevered passion. His firm, yet gentle hands came up to run through her hair, caressing her face and pulling back to stare into her eyes longingly. His still brimmed with tears from the unspoken torture that would soon befall him. She took his hand, leading him towards what would have been their marriage bed. Pulling him with her he crushed her close to him, holding her tightly. He took in every part of the woman he would never be able to spend his life with, caressing every part of her skin, memorizing her face and catching her sweet lips in his own. His hands became needier as they fisted through her hair, his tongue tracing her lips, seeking entrance to gain some comfort.

They made love in one another's arms, never taking a moment's breath from each other throughout the night. He never let her go, never let her feel unwanted. He would fulfill her final request, whatever she desired he would give to its fullest.

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It was almost midnight and she had fallen asleep hours ago. He watched her longing for the life he would never have. A life of happiness, a life of peace, he wished he could give her that. He could let her live, but that would only put her in danger and the grief she would feel from losing her family and friends would only add pain to her existence. Itachi didn't want that. He gently kissed her neck, waking her.

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"Shizuka." She heard his voice and awaoke, surprised to find herself still alive. The tears were again falling from his beautiful onyx eyes and she understood. It was less than an hour before he would have to leave; before he would have to endure an eternity of pain in solitude.

"I love you Itachi."

He captured her lips once more in his own, his kiss strong and needy, "I love you as well, are you ready?" She nodded, only now feeling a small pang of fear at the prospect of death. It was something that had to be done and she didn't want him to see the fear she felt exposed on her face, "I will give you the happiness in a dream that I couldn't in reality." She glanced at him puzzled at first before closing her eyes, understanding his meaning.

"One last kiss?" His lips brushed against her own before she met his Sharingan. She had seen it several times and had even been in several Genjutsu before. Itachi had taught her how to break them, but now she didn't struggle.

Her surroundings suddenly shifted, throwing her off balance as she suddenly stood in a beautiful field outside the village. She recognized the place outside the forests that surrounded Konoha. She turned to see Itachi's smiling face racing towards her. He suddenly grabbed her, lifting her off the ground and captured her lips in a sweet and gentle kiss; the way he always used to.

"Itachi? What's going on?" He simply smiled and pointed to a small Sasuke who was running to catch up with his brother. She watched as the two trained in the meadow and then they all had lunch. Sasuke rambling on about school, causing Itachi to laugh and her with them. She tried to question Itachi again and again about the mission, about what had happened and why she had suddenly appeared in a meadow. Weeks went by, followed by months and she forgot the questioning as she stared at him down the aisle. Their wedding day was perfect, Sasuke carried the rings and Itachi stood waiting for her, happiness displayed across his face that made her heart soar. Sasuke's eyes glistened with excitement as she walked down the aisle towards his brother.

It was only a year later that she discovered she was pregnant. She could help her excitement and the expression on Itachi's face when she told him he was going to be a father; it was one of sheer joy. He took work in town, refusing missions that took him away from home; much to the clans disapproval. Nine months later their first son was born. Six more followed in the passing years; four girls, two boys.

They watched as Sasuke married the pink-haired Sakura Haruno. Their wedding being small, yet beautiful; he was happy, and Itachi was happy at seeing his brother so at peace. Itachi's parents had given birth to another late in their years granting Itachi the chance to have a little sister. Sasuke was immediately attached to her, shooing away any boys who showed interest when she hit her teenage years.

Their children grew, all becoming fine Shinobi and making the Uchiha clan proud. It seemed life had been a blessing to them, yet something still tugged at the corner of her mind, trying to remind her of some forgotten tragedy.

"Itachi?" It was late as she curled herself tighter into his arms.

"Yes love?"

"Thank you." I felt him smile before sleep came over me.

"You're welcome." Itachi stared at her slumbering figure, it had taken only minutes to run through their entire lives, but it was something he would not soon forget. He ran his hand lovingly up her side before driving his fingers and Chakra into her main artery, severing it, immediately stopping her heart. The tears fell from his face as he realized the start to his nightmare. He covered her up carefully, leaving the safety and comfort of her loving embrace.

To face his oncoming, eternal Hell…

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**Okay, I changed this from first person to third so I hope you like it. I just don't care for first person, it just doesn't flow right from me.**

**I would love to know your opinions so please leave a comment and let me know if I missed an "I" or "me" anywhere in there. lol**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Ja Ne**


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